Friday, April 3, 2009

If you have time on your hands and need a laugh...

Try this:

Google the phrase "unfortunately,_______________" and fill the blank with your name. Put the whole thing in quotation marks. Hilarity will ensue.

Here are a few results from my search:

"Unfortunately, Emily turned out an old maid because of her father."

"Unfortunately, Emily has neglected to inform Joe that she is now married to Deputy Marshal Wade McPhail."

"Unfortunately Emily seems to have participated in such a disturbing crime and the video and pictures have been leaked."

"Unfortunately, Emily is still feeling a little different as she is the only half-human/half-mermaid hybrid she knows."

Just what I needed during Friday's lunch break. What funnies do you find? Post your favorites in a comment.


  1. what the heck is right!!

    here is a sampling of what i found...

    Unfortunately, Juli rolls over in her sleep, crushing you between the ground and her breast.

    Unfortunately, Juli is beginning to see him for the shallow boy everyone says he is! Is it a case of too little, too late for Bryce?

    That was unexpected, and unfortunately Juli finds herself ill prepared to handle a steady swarm of sharp objects thrown in her direction.

    Unfortunately, Juli came to senses and realized that getting married and having children really wasn’t that bad.

    Thanks for the laugh Em!

  2. Unfortunately, Jamie is unable to walk very far. Her little head experiences tremors when she is excited or is trying to reach for something.

    Unfortunately, Jamie lost out to Viggo Mortensen for Eastern Promises.

    Unfortunately, Jamie, who is in charge of all of the money and passports, is robbed of everything by a mugger. (This sounds like something that might have happened on tour!!!)

    Unfortunately, Jamie was in the pub having a few pints and had forgtten about it.

    The duo remained good friends and put on a spectacular match at Bloodfest where unfortunately, Jamie came out on the losing end.

    Unfortunately, Jamie's latest book is more style than substance.

    Unfortunately Jamie is now sitting in a damp jail cell, scratching graffiti on the wall.

    Unfortunately, Jamie possesses the brain size and mental acuity of a snail on drugs and is totally unable to make the connection to her past boyfriend.

    Unfortunately, Jamie keeps tripping over the bodies of headless chickens,

    I think I need to stop there...

  3. All of your responses were so much more interesting than mine. What came up for my name was:

    Unfortunately Angie waited until he was very sick to tell Joe and Angela he was having surgery. . .

    Unfortunately Angie's organization doesn't have a designated person who does web stuff.

    I guess my parents should have given me a name with more interseting possibilities.

  4. Hahaha this is hysterical...

    "unfortunately jourdan's prose is often just plain turgid"

    "Unfortunately, Jourdan's barely-there white hotpants drew attention to just how thin she has become in recent months"

    "Unfortunately, Jourdan omits the Haitian Revolution from her ambitious analysis of the transatlantic revolutionary era"
    haha, what???

    "unfortunately Jourdan and Irina decided that late in the night they were going to try and seduce my amazing husband Chad White"

    "Unfortunately, Jourdan and Caron had very little chemistry on screen and their individual characters are intimidating as well."

    Apparently, I should have been an incredibly horrible soap opera actress in another life :)

  5. Hee, I did this and came up with you posting about the other four results I got too. How's that for meta-blogginess?